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  • Writer's pictureKim Dudko

Love in a Time Crunch - Keeping Relationships Alive

In our fast-paced, hyperconnected world, finding time for ourselves can feel like a luxury, let alone carving out quality moments for the ones we love. Yet, nurturing our romantic relationships remains crucial amidst the endless to-do lists and overflowing inboxes. Neglecting this vital aspect of our lives can leave us feeling lonely, disconnected, and ultimately unfulfilled.

So, how do we maintain or reconnect and nurture our bond with our partners when time seems to be in constant short supply?

As a relationship counsellor, I've witnessed the struggles and triumphs of countless couples navigating this very challenge. Here are some tips I've found most effective in helping couples rekindle the spark and keep their love thriving:

1. Embrace the Power of Micro-Moments:

Forget grand gestures and weekend getaways (although those can be lovely too). The key lies in harnessing the power of micro-moments.

These are those seemingly insignificant snippets of time – a shared coffee break, a five- minute walk during lunch, or even a few stolen glances across the dinner table. Injecting these moments with intentionality can make a world of difference.

2. Make Quality Conversation a Priority:

Amidst the daily chatter, do we truly listen to each other? Schedule regular check-ins, even if it's just for 15 minutes before bed. Avoid distractions, ask open-ended questions, and actively listen to your partner's thoughts and feelings.

This dedicated time fosters deeper connection and understanding, reminding you why you fell in love in the first place.

3. Rekindle the Flame of Playfulness:

Remember the carefree laughter and spontaneous adventures that fuelled your relationship in the early days?

Don't let them fade! Schedule fun activities together, whether trying a new recipe, playing a board game, or walking in the park. Laughter and

shared experiences strengthen your bond and keep the spark alive.

4. Express Appreciation, Big and Small:

A simple "thank you" for making coffee or taking out the rubbish can go a long way. Express gratitude for the big and small things, acknowledging your partner's efforts and contributions. This fosters a sense of appreciation and reminds both of you that you're a team, not just roommates.

5. Embrace Technology, Strategically:

Technology can be a double-edged sword. While it can connect us instantly, it can also create distance if not used mindfully. Set boundaries – designate "device-free" zones during meals and evenings and resist the urge to constantly check your phone when together. Use technology to your advantage – send a loving text during the day, plan a virtual date night if you're apart, or share a funny meme that made you think of them.

6. Prioritise Self-Care, Together:

Remember, you can't light a fire for others if your own flame is flickering. Prioritise your own well-being and encourage your partner to do the same. Do things that make you feel alive and recharged, whether exercising, meditation, spending time in nature, or pursuing hobbies. Feeling good individually overflows into your relationship, creating a more positive and supportive dynamic.

7. Seek Help When Needed:

If you're struggling to reconnect or feel overwhelmed by communication challenges, don't hesitate to seek professional help. A relationship counsellor can provide a safe space to explore your concerns, develop healthy communication skills, and strengthen your bond as a couple.

Remember, nurturing your relationship is an ongoing process, not a one-time event. By incorporating these tips and prioritising quality time with your partner, even in a busy world, you can cultivate a thriving relationship filled with love, connection, and joy. So, take a deep breath, put your phone away, and focus on the person who truly matters – the one you share your life and heart with.

I believe in the power of love and the resilience of human connection. With dedication and a little effort, we can all create relationships that are time-resistant and thrive in the face of any challenge.

By Kim Dudko BACP

Kim Dudko has worked at Senior Management and Director level as an HR Professional for over 25 years and has retrained as a Therapeutic Counsellor, which she has been practising in over the last four years and has her own business – 3 Shires Therapy ( She has excellent insight into how companies and individuals benefit from looking after their Mental Health, whether as individuals or businesses.

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